{"id":975,"date":"2017-08-18T22:37:29","date_gmt":"2017-08-19T02:37:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogpage.sandrassoulserenity.com\/?p=975"},"modified":"2022-07-20T11:28:10","modified_gmt":"2022-07-20T15:28:10","slug":"autism-the-serenity-in-a-smile","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogpage.sandrassoulserenity.com\/index.php\/2017\/08\/18\/autism-the-serenity-in-a-smile\/","title":{"rendered":"Autism & The Serenity In A Smile."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Autism, for everyone it means something different. That’s because every child that has it, is not exactly the same. \u00a0I like to say they’re “customized”. \u00a0They truly are….. something special. \u00a0A parent feels the depth of that word when they live a life with Autism. \u00a0For me, I feel it in the Serenity of a smile, HIS smile. Quite simply, for me, that is all that I need for a better day.<\/span><\/p>\n

I’m not going into the challenges that are involved. They of course, are significant. \u00a0So significant, that I owe who I’ve become to it, to him. I’m a flawed individual like everyone else, but I’m strong, I’m compassionate, and I know all about self sacrifice. \u00a0I don’t want to share every detail about the moments I’m overwhelmed with guilt. \u00a0Have I done enough? No, I know I could do more, so keep trying. \u00a0I also can’t describe the depth of my fears. There are no adequate words to express its magnitude. \u00a0When my life is done, how will his be?<\/span><\/p>\n

I cling to hope that my soul will be there, always at his side. Please don’t be alone, and I won’t let anyone hurt you. I promise. Those times when the question creeps in, for whatever reason the doubt, “Is there really life after death? I think….oh please, there has to be. He needs me! So, I try not to think of it. \u00a0My life is always worth living . I will live it for him. When I am gone, he won’t see me, but I’ll be there. Quite frankly, as I write this now, the tears are coming. Expected or not. It is fear, it is truth, it is love.<\/span><\/p>\n

What I do want to discuss, is the magic. \u00a0Yes, Magic. \u00a0He’s a pro at it but there are no tricks, and no schemes…it’s authentic and there are moments in time where time stands still.<\/span><\/p>\n

There’s times when I, like everyone else, thinks of the bills, family, an IEP meeting at the school, the chores, and just dealing with overall feelings in the day. Then, he walks into the room, smiling. \u00a0Right there, time stands still. If I could freeze it just a bit longer, I would. \u00a0With a random hug he teaches me to slow down. No agenda. No favors to ask, and nothing he wants me to get. Just to hug….. and I try to never let go first. \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0 \u00a0\"\"<\/span><\/p>\n

Please, if you’re not sitting, you should. He quite often asks me “Do YOU need anything? \u00a0Or “love you”. \u00a0Just then, he’s melted away every last bit of tension. I’m bathing in serenity. I think I’ll just soak in it.<\/span><\/p>\n

As a mom, I tried to hide any pain when something goes wrong, or let him witness anything there’s no need for him to see. \u00a0Many moms do. He senses it though. He pauses, watches, and says “You ok? Yet, I won’t soon forget that when a tear escaped, he so softly wiped if from my face. “I know Mum, it will be okay, don’t cry”.<\/span><\/p>\n

I look to his eyes and think …I need him like he needs me. Probably more. He doesn’t even know. He only knows of this woman that loves him, that hugs him, but will never understand the actual need I have for him. \u00a0He doesn’t know of his endless storage of magic. \u00a0Abracadabra….LOVE.<\/span><\/p>\n

Sorry, not sorry. Of course, when we share our thoughts or stresses, validation shows support. But please, never say sorry, because I’m not. I have never said those words. He is my greatest gift.<\/span><\/p>\n

Thankfully, he is so contagiously kind that I have not faced much ugliness from the outside world. Yes, at times I do feel we’re in a world of our own. Yet, those words stunned me. It was not from ugliness, it was from a kind old lady that I admired. \u00a0When I explained why as an adult he’s still home, \u00a0She said “Oh, I’m so sorry”. \u00a0I paused, I had to digest that. I love him. \u00a0I never want him to leave, but a sacrificial love says…..I wish he could.<\/span><\/p>\n

Either way, I’ll never be sorry. Please, neither should you. That is exactly why I share this now.<\/span><\/p>\n

Like every child, mine is also a gift. \u00a0I’d say mine is homemade. For some, they prefer diamonds and pearls or anything exquisite for display. \u00a0Others, like me, see the value in homemade. \u00a0The beauty of its creative design. Some of it flawed, unique, and oozing with love. No to be pawned, and no store credit.<\/span><\/p>\n

My heart<\/a>, its vault…… and mine for a lifetime.<\/span><\/p>\n

Did you know our site has a live chat room dedicated for the special needs and their caregivers? \u00a0You can visit now<\/a> for more details. If you like this, don’t forget to like our facebook page and sign up for our newsletter. We don’t want you to miss a thing!<\/span><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n

\"\"I wrote this several year ago. \u00a0Until now, I’ve only shared with family and friends. \u00a0I’m proud to set it free for the world to see.<\/span><\/p>\n

Magic<\/span><\/p>\n

\n
\n
\n

My pride and joy we’re a gift to each other,<\/span><\/p>\n

Thank God I was chosen to be his mother.<\/span><\/p>\n

A boy with limitations, but does not complain<\/span><\/p>\n

To smile ear to ear with no reason for shame<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

A tear in his eye, when I sing him a song<\/span><\/p>\n

This mother he loves, could do no wrong.<\/span><\/p>\n

He brings in the sunshine after the rain<\/span><\/p>\n

When he offers a hug to heal your pain.<\/span><\/p>\n

My little Greg, my happy little man,<\/span><\/p>\n

sometimes others just don’t understand<\/span><\/p>\n

You are a gem, one so rare indeed,<\/span><\/p>\n

You’re the perfect example of what we all need.<\/span><\/p>\n

Feel my love as you continue to grow,<\/span><\/p>\n

show the world what they don’t know<\/span><\/p>\n

There’s a magic that you bring into the heart<\/span><\/p>\n

No one compares…it sets you apart.<\/span><\/p>\n

You don’t know hate, you could do no harm<\/span><\/p>\n

Your gentle manner is your strongest charm<\/span><\/p>\n

Life is a struggle, realistically not fair<\/span><\/p>\n

you will have hardships, more than your share.<\/span><\/p>\n

You’re not afraid, because only you can see<\/span><\/p>\n

You have a strength that will set you free<\/span><\/p>\n

“Vigilant” describes the name I chose for you<\/span><\/p>\n

You will focus and strive in all that you do.<\/span><\/p>\n

A genius in disguise, he awaits his debut<\/span><\/p>\n

Thank God for my son, Gregory…I love you!<\/span><\/p>\n

Written by Sandra Carter<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

\"\"<\/span><\/p>\n

My wedding day.<\/span><\/p>\n

2006<\/span><\/p>\n

The best man<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Copyrighted.com<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  Autism, for everyone it means something different. That’s because every child that has it, is not exactly the same. \u00a0I like to say they’re “customized”. \u00a0They truly are….. something special. \u00a0A parent feels the depth of that word when they live a life with Autism. \u00a0For me, I feel it in the Serenity of […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":992,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[135],"tags":[47,57,56,58,22],"post_folder":[],"class_list":["post-975","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-family","tag-autism","tag-healing","tag-love","tag-special-needs","tag-spirituality"],"yoast_head":"\nAutism & The Serenity In A Smile. - Sandra's Soul Serenity Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"The Pleasures of Raising a Special Needs Child.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, 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