Making Your Valentines Day Vows. How to Love the Day

If you’d like to actually enjoy Valentine’s Day, making Valentine’s Day Vows is a good way to learn how. Whether you’re single, married, or in a “it’s complicated” situation, adapting this method will not only help in enduring it, but to even look forward to it.  I read and hear many complaints for the loathing of a holiday that is all about love. Admittedly, the explanations I’ve heard are certainly understandable but also quite debatable as well.

The most common reason for the criticism of this day is that why should love be expressed and celebrated on this one day when there’s 364 other days of the year?  Understood. I think if I were to only hear expressions of love or receive flowers on one day of the year my relationship status would be going from “married” to “It’s complicated” in a Valentine’s Day heartbeat. I’d still enjoy the day though. The day is what I make of it.

Come other holidays and people find ways to love it. St. Patricks Day has always been amusing to observe. To see those without a drop of Irish Blood dressed in green head to toe starting their day with green eggs and ham.  “Today, Irish I am”. 

Ever wonder why we have a Mother’s Day and a Father’s Day? Most don’t. Shouldn’t mothers and fathers be loved and respected all year? Why do we reserve ONE day to show it?  The reason most don’t flinch over the holiday is because everyone has a mother and father and regardless if they’ve ever had a relationship with one or the other, eventually, many also become a parent themselves.  Quite different from Valentine’s Day as many who are in no relationship find the holiday depressing, and therefor, determine it is pointless. Relationships don’t define us…we do.

Google holiday calendars. Secretary day. Why show your appreciation for your secretary just on this one day?

First, let me say,  I’m a bit biased of this holiday as it’s also my birthday. As I have gotten older though, I’d like to forget that I’m yet another year older and just simply look at the bright side.  It’s Valentine’s Day. I can’t control how old I get, but I can control how I feel about a holiday revolved around love. I also feel very much validated in the large consumption of chocolate… guilt free. Happy Birthday to me!

 

 

So, what are some vows we can make to actually embrace the holiday or at least find it bearable? Try these..

I vow to learn to love myself (if I don’t already) and to remind myself what my strengths are and other good qualities.

I vow not to allow the actions of others (or lack of) define this day. I know what I deserve even when others do not.

I vow to make extra acts of kindness in additions to the ones I may have done other times as well. Go beyond buying the car behind you a cup of coffee at the drive thru.  Grab a bouquet of flowers, visit the elderly at the nursing home handing each one a flower. Whatever you have the time and funds for. Leave post it notes for your coworkers with a joke to make them laugh, or telling them why you like them. Remember, it’s not as much about what we say, it’s what we do that our children learn from.  To see these actions will then be the inspiration. With so much hate going on in the world, how nice it would be for them to look forward to extra acts of kindness among their peers.  

Vow to treat yourself more often, if possible, go all out. Buy your own flowers.  You can grab a bouquet while out doing groceries. Take an extra hour in a bubble bath with a glass of wine. Men, treat yourself to an action packed or gruesome horror movie.  No chick flicks that many other times you’d be obliged to watch.

 

For many, life is very busy. It’s so hard sometimes to stay in touch with our friends and extended family. Before social media, how did we keep up? Let’s face it, it helps…. but a quick comment or like under their status is as far as we usually go.  If you think a friend or family member won’t appreciate a heartfelt message in their inbox, think again.  Messaging them a quick “I know we don’t talk very often but just want you to know I miss and appreciate you, I hope you enjoy the day” reminds them how much they’re loved. So, Vow on this day to reach out to those you don’t contact as often and vow it won’t be until next Valentine’s Day before you do it again. 

Start out with those 5 vows and watch what happens. How much better you’ll feel.  I’m willing to bet you could learn Valentine’s Day could be a holiday you respect as much as any other.  Each year, whatever vows you have adapted put them in writing.  On the next Valentine’s Day, tweak with them or add more.

Love and value yourself regardless of what you do or don’t receive.  However, by also giving to others, the heart just beats stronger. When you can hear the beat….you can dance.

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